Bob Awesome’s awesome posts started out on Facebook.
Here’s what we’ve had so far…
Bob Awesome has no unsightly nose hair.
Bob Awesome – The goal that perfection aspires to.
Bob Awesome – Refreshes the parts that other Bobs can’t reach
Bob Awesome could eat three Shredded Wheat.
Darkness fears Bob Awesome
When sheep have trouble sleeping, they count Bob Awesome.
Bob Awesome’s Pin number is Pi to 100’000 digits.
He has never had to write it down.
Bob Awesome can boil water using a heated argument.
Santa’s making a list, checking it twice, then handing it over to Bob Awesome for proof reading.
Bob Awesome is fluent in all languages
Bob Awesome es fluido en todas las lenguas
Coupe au carré Awesome est coulante dans toutes les langues
Bob Awesome ist in allen Sprachen fließend
Bob Awesome è fluente in tutte le lingue
Bob Awesome is worth 19 points in Scrabble.
This doesn’t matter because the mere act of spelling his name is an automatic win.
Bob Awesome always has four bars of signal.
Bob Awesome is visible from space.
Bob Awesome would be happy to give you his last Rolo.
Bob Awesome is so fast he once outran his own shadow…
Bob Awesome has never had to change his mind, because his first choice is always the right choice.
Bob Awesome has beaten the land speed record, on a space hopper.
Bob Awesome’s souffle never falls.
There are some things that money can’t buy, for everything else, there’s Bob Awesome.
Bob Awesome never loses Noughts and Crosses.
If a tree falls in the forest, Bob Awesome will hear it.
Bob Awesome’s breath is always minty fresh.
Bob Awesome knows the way to Amarillo
Bob Awesome can hear dog whistles.
Bob Awesome can sneeze with his eyes open.
In times of crisis, just think “What would Bob Awesome do?”
The moon orbits the earth because it is inexorably drawn to Bob Awesome.
When Bob Awesome pops, he CAN stop.
Bob Awesome’s christmas presents unwrap themselves to save him the trouble.
Ask not what Bob Awesome can do for you, but what you can do for Bob Awesome.
The answer is nothing, as there is nothing Bob Awesome cannot do for himself.
In space, Bob Awesome can hear you scream
Bob Awesome never leaves the toilet seat up.
Bob Awesome is delicious and entirely fat free.
Bob Awesome once rode Halleys Comet
When you kick your duvet covers off during the night, Bob Awesome will come and tuck you in.
The dinosaurs were not, as has been suggested in scientific circles, wiped out by a meteor strike.
In a heroic effort to save the species, Bob Awesome caught the meteor, hurling it back into space.
He was displeased when they proved ungrateful…
Bob Awesome does not sleep. He waits. (Miester, 2009)
Bob awesome doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. (Miester, 2009)
Bob Awesome is the only man to have experienced the joy of childbirth.
He said it was easy…
Bob Awesome would love to share a self portrait with you all, but you simply couldn’t handle it!
Bob Awesome gives his sat nav directions.
Bob Awesome: The reason the Mona Lisa is smiling
A lot of people are asking “Who is Bob Awesome?”
How dare they.
Bob Awesome is in fact so incredibly awesome, that at his birth the doctors and nurses were blinded by the sheer awesomeness radiating from him.
This sadly did not work out well for his mother when they came to stitch her up.
Luckily, in the few minutes it took them to make a complete mess of it, Bob Awesome had earned h…is medical degree and soon put things right.
How very awesome of him!
Bob Awesome once won an arm wrestling contest with God
Bob Awesome updates his status by the power of thought alone
Bob Awesome has such incredible self control he can make his heartbeat thump out popular show tunes.
Bob Awesome is so awesome, he cooks his Christmas turkey just by glaring at it.
Reverse order of most recent to earliest.
Enjoy Bob fans!